Opowiadanie na angielski

Może ktoś checknąć? Już nie mam siły tego czytać, wszystko mi sie juz pomieszało ;)

Cytuj:

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Finally it is! The 24th of December! I've been waiting whole year for that. I couldn't wait for evening... My mom asked me to make a good climate in the house. At first I brought a pine tree to home. I'm not keen on decorating, so my mom worked on it. In the meantime I hung some mistletoes and turned on carols. Day passed in the blink of an eye.
Nine o'clock has struck. Suddenly, I heard knocking. My heart started to beat faster. I opened the door and I saw him. Big, fat, white-beared man wearing red coat and carrying huge bag of presents. I invited him to my bedroom. He sat on my bed. I apologised, left him alone and went for my baseball bat. When I came back to my guest I noticed that he was looking out the window. I knew it's the moment. I took a swing and hit his head. He fell on the floor dropping his bag. I gagged him and threw the body to cellar. I came back to bag and did a review of all gifts. They all were mine. Much time passed, I lost track of time. The pleasure was interrupted by doorbell. Who could it be? I was a little scared. I opened the door and saw Santa's good, old friend, snowman being Jack Frost. He seemed angry. And certainly he was. He pushed me on wall and . I was afraidd as hell and told him the whole truth. He noticed all the presents and got angry even more. I felt penetrating frost. He turned me into an ice cube. I only saw him running out of home...
I woke up next day. I saw my brother playing with his new toys, mom wearing her new clothes, and dad tasting his new whiskey. Where are my gifts? I checked floor under christmas tree. Oh, there were they. Some branches and coal... Anyway, it was the most crazy Christmas ever!

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1. Czy "cellar" to faktycznie jest piwnica?
2. Może mi ktoś podrzucić słowko do "coal"? Kompletnie mi wylecialo z glowy. Cos w stylu "pack", "pocket", "plenty" (z tym ze to ostatnie oznacza bardziej "mnostwo", a tutaj raczej powinno byc "troche").
3. Czy "be pissed off" jest wulgarne, czy raczej mozna uzywac w - przykladowo - rozmowie z osobą starszą?

Cytuj:

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Finally it is! The 24th of December! I've been waiting whole year for that day. I couldn't wait for the evening... My mom asked me to make a good climate in the house. At first I brought a pine tree to home. I'm not keen on decorating, so my mom worked on it. In the meantime I hung some mistletoes and turned on carols. Day passed in the blink of an eye.
Nine o'clock has struck. Suddenly, I heard knocking. My heart started to beat faster. I opened the door and I saw him. Big, fat, white-bearded man wearing red coat and carrying huge bag of presents. I invited him to my bedroom. He sat on my bed. I apologised, left him alone and went for my baseball bat. When I came back to my guest I noticed that he was looking out the window. I knew it's the moment. I took a swing and hit his head. He fell on the floor dropping his bag. I gagged him and threw the body to the cellar. I came back to the bag and did a review of all gifts. They were all mine. Much time passed, I lost track of time. The pleasure was interrupted by a doorbell. Who could it be? I was a little scared. I opened the door and saw Santa's good, old friend, a snowman being - Jack Frost. He seemed angry. And he certainly was. He pushed me to the wall. I was afraidd as hell and told him the whole truth. He noticed all the presents and got angrier even more. I felt penetrating frost. He turned me into an ice cube. I only saw him running out of home...
I woke up next day. I saw my brother playing with his new toys, mom wearing her new clothes, and dad tasting his new whiskey. Where are my gifts? I checked floor under christmas tree. Oh, there were they. Some branches and coal... Anyway, that was the craziest Christmas ever!

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wegiel moze byc

Cytuj:

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3. Czy "be pissed off" jest wulgarne, czy raczej mozna uzywac w - przykladowo - rozmowie z osobą starszą?

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ja bym raczej nie uzywal, lepiej cos w stylu irritated

No i wywal ostatnie zdanie, bo wklepane jest na siłę. Fajniej będzie wyglądać bez niego.

Ostatnie zdanie musi być.
"Napisz opowiadanie, które kończy sie zdaniem:". -z tym, ze zapomniałem jakie to ma być dokładnie zdanie, to jest taka wersja robocza
Dzieki za pomoc, z tego co widzę chyba nie jest najgorzej z moim angielskim. Napisałem to z braku czegokolwiek do roboty, a wyglądało to tak, ze co chwilę cofałem sie 2 zdania do tylu, zmieniałem coś, a potem nie sprawdzałem całości, no i wyszły takie beznadziejne błędy w postaci złych kolejności wyrazów... Wrzuciłem tutaj głównie z powodu "the" i "a" i jak widać słusznie postapiłem ;)
Zielone bagi lecą.